Blockbusters in Theaters, Flops on Consoles

Back as a kid, I used to make this sandwich with peanut butter, jelly, ketchup, mustard and mayonnaise. It tasted more disgusting than it sounds. I naively thought that putting two good things together, like peanut butter and ketchup, will make something better. Of course, that’s not necessarily true, but it doesn’t stop Hollywood studios from combining movies with games to make movie games.

Seriously! Movie games are terrible! They’re cash cows meant to sucker people out of money because the name of a blockbuster hit is on the box. What makes movies poor choices for games is that there clearly is no thought in their development. With frustrating controls and terrible game design, movie games are quickly rushed to coincide with a movie's release. If you thought I couldn’t get any stupider than making a peanut butter and ketchup sandwich, you're wrong. I own Rugrats in Paris for the N64. 

Ooey Gooey World will forever haunt me

The worst offender of this Hollywood scheme was the Cat in the Hat, based on the 2003 film with Mike Myers. For some odd reason, I enjoyed this bad movie when it came out. So, like any good mother, mine thought that since I liked video games and I liked this movie, a video game based on the Cat in the Hat movie would be the perfect Christmas gift. Her heart was in the right place, but she couldn’t be further from the truth.

Gameplay: mind-numbingly dumb. 

Voice overs: horrendous. 

Guy in the purple suit: on the thing of things I hate the most in the universe up there with Hitler and rude passengers on airplanes. 

Twas a glorious day when I finally went to Gamestop and sold it for $2. Sorry mom.

You’d think with age comes wisdom, but that clearly wasn’t the case with me. How else can you explain Speed Racer: The Videogame in my collection?  That’s what you get when the main incentive to buy this game is an expired movie ticket voucher. And even that’s a rip-off! It was $10 to see the movie yet they only reimburse you for $7.50!

Can't decide whether the movie or game was worse

It works the other way around too. Games made into movies are equally bad. Go ahead, flame me all you want, but the Super Mario Bros movie should have never existed. The main actors have said in many interviews this was the worst movie they ever did and had to get drunk on set to get through filming. Yeah, that’s pretty bad. The problem with most games that become movies are that they take too much liberty from the source material and continually drag on the plot with unnecessary additions. I personally don't like video game movies because they take out the original interactive component of the game's universe.  

May you rest in peace Bob Hoskins

But alas, like a rose growing in the tundra, there are some movie games that break the mold and are actually good. Goldeneye, Spider-Man 2, and Aladdin are all great games that I sadly don’t own. 

Don't cry for me, I'm already dead

If you find a movie game, don't walk, run away! Don’t fall into the trap. That great blockbuster in theaters won't bring the same joy when you pop it in to your PlayStation. Don’t buy into the temptation, or you’ll find yourself waking up at 3 a.m. wondering why you own Tigger's Honey Hunt on the N64.

Don't ask...

HH

The Mecca of Nintendo Fans

Last week, my family and I went to the Big Apple to visit my sister. Of course, we went to the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, the Empire State Building, all that New York stuff. But there's one place down Rockefeller that we had to visit before I left. I finally made the holy pilgrimage to the Mecca of Nintendo fans...

NINTENDO WORLD!

 

Be still my beating heart.

Walking in the store, we were greeted by the security guard and a tower of Mario plushies with more Toads than the Mushroom Kingdom. For a small store in respect to other New York stores, there was quite a bit to take in. To the right was a real-life Mario Kart to promote Mario Kart 8. You might recognize it from events like this year's South by Southwest (SXSW). Unfortunately, you couldn't sit in it. We took a look at the shirts, toys, and 3DS demos before following the racetrack upstairs.

Unbeknownst to my brother, that racetrack would lead him to riches greater than El Dorado. As a collector of video game plushies, he naturally spazzed seeing all the Pokémon toys. While he bumped into people grabbing everything he could hold, I made my way to the museum in the corner of the store. 

Consoles, games, and memorabilia spanning generations of gaming were all on display. A DS signed by Carried Underwood when she promoted Nintendogs, a Luma from Burger King, the Master Sword and Hyrulian Shield Miyamoto held promoting Skyward Sword, a damaged Gameboy from the Gulf War that still works, and so much more. It was surprising they didn't charged admission.

  

Going to Nintendo World, I felt inspired. It's an odd thing to say about a video game store, but Nintendo World's atmosphere was unlike any I've experienced. When a young family went up to the museum display, the parents gushed over the NES they played with as kids and shared a good laugh explaining how they made games work by blowing the cartridge. A young kid was having the time of his life driving as Luigi in Mario Kart 8 despite getting 5th. I even had a chance to swap stories with the employees and reminisce about the good times we had playing Zelda. Nintendo World is sort of like Disney without the rides and expensive cotton candy. It's a magical hub where people from all other gather, united by their love for Nintendo.

My family created our own memories playing Shovel Knight (which I will be streaming on Twitch in the near future so stay tuned). We took turns playing, cheering each other on as we repeatedly fell to our death. We had so much fun we revisited Nintendo World...twice. There was nothing greater than sharing the joy of gaming, and I know I will always cherish my visit to Nintendo World. It helped remind me why I fell in love with games in the first place. The N64 promotional poster said it best, it's all about fun.